Dump wrong friends
Friends come in many categories –best friends, casual friends and ex-friends. Good friends make life rosy and give a boost to your success.
The idea of “friendship forever“ has replaced that of “marriage forever”. Author Jan yager of when Friendship hurts and friend shifts says sometimes the feeling or a hope of a friendship forever turns out to be a myth.
Just like couples, friends can break up too. But how can you dump a friend? In cases of major rifts says author Ayn Rand advises being direct but end the friendship.
While it sounds cruel to abandon long time friends without offering any proper response, it is easy to let some friendships frizzle. Don’t return calls as quickly, avoid plans or make the plans for a later date that there’s time if you wish to cancel it. Most friends get a hint with this attitude says Yeager.
Phasing out friends who have hurt you, let you down –pay other dividends. One benefit of pruning destructive friendships is you will have more time and energy to positive relationships and to cultivate new friendships.
Remember, the term toxic friendships refer to relationships that are consistently negative and draining. It is the pattern, not the one-time or occasional lapses in the balance of needing that occurs between good friends. If your truly needy friend has been that way for some time, the real possibilities of changing the relationship verge on hopeless.
These are people whose needs can never be satiated. No matter what you give, what you do, how much, or how often, it will never be enough. Since character tends to endure, this person probably treats other people the same way she treats you. It’s likely that many of her friends have probably already dropped out of the picture and that’s why she is so dependent on you.
One of the first things we have to understand about bad friends is that they suck the life out of you, slowly and surely. Instead of trying to fix someone up all the time, learn to understand when to end a friendship, especially if it’s a bad one. Even since we were little boys and girls, we’ve been made to believe that friendships last forever, that our friends are always going to be there for us. We were our happiest when we were with friends. Besides being our friends, they act as our support group, escort agents and shopping guides. But friendship also comes with a “conditions apply” clause.
The give-and-take policy works here too, as with everything else in the world. The last time you and your friend went shopping and saw that exclusive Gucci bag, did she just step aside and let you have it or do you still have those tell-tale injury marks to prove your survival?
Now who exactly is a bad friend, you may ask. For starters, they are the ones who expect to be included in every single outing, the ones who take over the story you have been telling somebody else, and the ones that try to dominate you every second of your life. Initially, every bad friend presents themselves as a kind and caring person. But it’s all just an act, even if your friend doesn’t know it themselves. Bad friends are unintentional masters in the art of deception.
There’s a fine line between being there for a friend and never being away from friends. In the workplace, there is the bad friend who calls themselves your friend but stabs you in the back if the boss happens to appreciate your work over theirs says Psychiatrists Majid Khan.
At a party, a bad friend always tries to steal the thunder and if you happen to get more of the spotlight, you’re going to pay for it. Calculative and deceiving, your bad excuse of a friend will pretend to be your best friend forever until you deprive her of something that she believes is hers explains trainer Vineeta Gera.
Sitcoms too have their own share of bad friends, whose sole ambition is to see their friend crash and burn. So why are we still friends with a bad friend? The answer is totally up to you. As we all know, the very nature of friendship can be tricky. If you don’t have to pop an aspirin after every visit from your annoying friend, then you’re probably fine for now.
But if you feel like you’ve been hammered on the head every time you spend time with this bad friend of yours, then you really need to look deep into your friendship and give this bad relationship a thorough inspection.
If you feel better about your friends you are more likely to feel better about yourself. Dump a wrong friends before it is too late to make corrections in life.